Заработало..
нужно было внимательно читать man pae
и соседний тред ;)

https://www.opennet.ru/openforum/vsluhforumID1/66745.html
Спасибо lavr :)

вообщем короткий отчёт

proxy# uname -rms
FreeBSD 7.0-RC1 i386
proxy# sysctl hw.model
hw.model: Intel(R) Xeon(R) CPU           E5345  @ 2.33GHz
proxy# dmesg | grep memory
real memory  = 9395240960 (8960 MB)
avail memory = 8402718720 (8013 MB)

сделал make buildkernel KERNCONF=PAE
в PAE заменил только
include GENERIC на include kern

proxy# cat /usr/src/sys/i386/conf/kern | egrep -v '^$|^#'
cpu             I686_CPU
ident           GEN
options         SCHED_4BSD              # 4BSD scheduler
options         PREEMPTION              # Enable kernel thread preemption
options         INET                    # InterNETworking
options         FFS                     # Berkeley Fast Filesystem
options         SOFTUPDATES             # Enable FFS soft updates support
options         UFS_ACL                 # Support for access control lists
options         UFS_DIRHASH             # Improve performance on big directories
options         UFS_GJOURNAL            # Enable gjournal-based UFS journaling
options         NFSCLIENT               # Network Filesystem Client
options         NFSSERVER               # Network Filesystem Server
options         MSDOSFS                 # MSDOS Filesystem
options         CD9660                  # ISO 9660 Filesystem
options         PROCFS                  # Process filesystem (requires PSEUDOFS)
options         PSEUDOFS                # Pseudo-filesystem framework
options         GEOM_PART_GPT           # GUID Partition Tables.
options         GEOM_LABEL              # Provides labelization
options         COMPAT_43TTY            # BSD 4.3 TTY compat [KEEP THIS!]
options         COMPAT_FREEBSD6         # Compatible with FreeBSD6
options         SCSI_DELAY=5000         # Delay (in ms) before probing SCSI
options         KTRACE                  # ktrace(1) support
options         SYSVSHM                 # SYSV-style shared memory
options         SYSVMSG                 # SYSV-style message queues
options         SYSVSEM                 # SYSV-style semaphores
options         _KPOSIX_PRIORITY_SCHEDULING # POSIX P1003_1B real-time extensions
options         KBD_INSTALL_CDEV        # install a CDEV entry in /dev
options         ADAPTIVE_GIANT          # Giant mutex is adaptive.
options         STOP_NMI                # Stop CPUS using NMI instead of IPI
options         AUDIT                   # Security event auditing
options         SMP                     # Symmetric MultiProcessor Kernel
device          apic                    # I/O APIC
device          cpufreq
device          eisa
device          pci
device          ata
device          atapicd                 # ATAPI CDROM drives
options         ATA_STATIC_ID           # Static device numbering
device          scbus                   # SCSI bus (required for SCSI)
device          ch                      # SCSI media changers
device          da                      # Direct Access (disks)
device          sa                      # Sequential Access (tape etc)
device          cd                      # CD
device          pass                    # Passthrough device (direct SCSI access)
device          ses                     # SCSI Environmental Services (and SAF-TE)
device          mfi                     # LSI MegaRAID SAS
device          atkbdc                  # AT keyboard controller
device          atkbd                   # AT keyboard
device          psm                     # PS/2 mouse
device          kbdmux                  # keyboard multiplexer
device          vga                     # VGA video card driver
device          sc
device          agp                     # support several AGP chipsets
device          pmtimer
device          sio                     # 8250, 16[45]50 based serial ports
device          uart                    # Generic UART driver
device          ppc
device          ppbus                   # Parallel port bus (required)
device          miibus                  # MII bus support
device          bce                     # Broadcom BCM5706/BCM5708 Gigabit Ethernet
device          loop                    # Network loopback
device          random                  # Entropy device
device          ether                   # Ethernet support
device          pty                     # Pseudo-ttys (telnet etc)
device          firmware                # firmware assist module
device          bpf                     # Berkeley packet filter

единственный минус в том что что на борту Dell PowerEdge 2950 клавиатуру и мышь можно подключить только по USB.. но думаю прорвёмся ;)